I sit here wondering what I will do with all my free time when I am finished with these classes. Will I blog more? Will I write more? Will I finally finish editing that video? Will I start doing yoga? Will I start taking dance classes again? Will I cook more like I use to? Will I just sit back on the couch and allow myself to watch the steam come off my cup of tea until it is cool enough to drink? What will I do with my time?
I sometimes wonder if I need to be constantly doing something. Constantly doing homework, constantly cleaning up, constantly preparing for the next move, constantly constant. Can I just sit still for a few moments? I can succeed in these pre-reqs, but can I succeed in simply relaxing?
I was at work today and was speaking to a friend about our parents. He said to me how he is beginning to understand his parent's relationship better now that he is becoming older. He is beginning to see it in a different light and envision the things that were once unclear. I think this happens to many of us. As children we grow up with a blurred vision of our parents, they are our parents and simply that. We place this image in a tight box unaware of their lives, accomplishments and needs, as children we are too naive to understand the vastness of who they really are. However, as we get older, smarter and are able to take step back, we realize that who we are and who we are becoming is so severely shaped by our parents, it's astounding. We have similar attributes and the ones that are not similar are different because we decided, based upon their choices, to go a different direction. We all are a new version of our parents with hints of them all over our faces and in our actions, it is a beautiful thing.
It is Father's Day today, I hope everyone had a chance to make contact with their dads. I called Pops this morning and spoke with both my mom and dad. It amazes me what a different light I see my parents in now that I have become an adult, am living on my own and have become an adult to them and not a little girl. They are real people. Growing up they were just parents to me. I suppose I shouldn't say just but that is what they were. There was no other dimensions to who they were, in my mind they didn't have friends or a life before me. However, as I became a teenager, as I went to college and as I am living across the country, I find it so amazing to see their own accomplishments and their own life flourishing in front of me. I find it soothing to listen to the stories they have and to hear the things that they are doing with their days together. It is inspiring to see such strength and growth in my own parents and I hope one day to be as strong and successful as both of them.
My tea is ready to drink.
God Bless.
